


Assassin's CreedxAvengers Crossover Crack!fic

by TourmalineQueen



Category: Assassin's Creed, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Crack, Crossover, Gen, One-Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-28
Updated: 2014-04-28
Packaged: 2018-01-17 13:56:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1390234
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TourmalineQueen/pseuds/TourmalineQueen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>From the Assassin's Creed Kinkmeme. The "Master Assassins" Clint and Natasha are part of an old order.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Assassin's CreedxAvengers Crossover Crack!fic

Tony looked at Steve. Steve looked at Tony. Both looked over to where Clint and Natasha were beating the shit out of a crowd of burly mercenary types.

"Should we tell Fury about this?" Steve asked.

Tony didn't reply.

The two Assassins had spotted the group of tattooed ruffians, while they were out strolling in the Park trying to relax after several weeks of heavy combat duty, said little by way of explanation and attacked them.

Bruce was looking uncomfortably unhappy with the way the group was fighting Hawkeye and Black Widow: they used dirty tactics to get results, but they seemed to still be outclassed by the pair. Although Steve looked like he'd rather be in the middle of the action, he left it to the Assassins to call for help if it was needed. None of the other Avengers felt especially needed in the melee.

Then, Clint gave a low whistle, and three new faces appeared, seemingly from nowhere. Two were young, a lithe curly haired brunette girl who looked about 15 but fought as well as Natasha, the other a muscular shaven headed guy who would not have been out of place as a strong-man/acrobat in a circus. And the third, a tall, broad, dark haired man with scarred lips and amber eyes that took in everything around him, clothed in a dark suit, like Coulson's. Or like a mafioso from _Goodfellas_ , Tony thought, getting edgy.

And, suddenly the park was filled with smoke, an eerie eagle's shriek sounded like a battle cry, and, as the smoke began to dissipate, all the enemies lay dead or dying in the grass, and the two Avenger Assassins were nodding deferentially to the tallest newcomer, obviously the leader.

" _Grazie amici_ ," the leader said, with a wink and a winning smile for Natasha, while Clint glared at him.

"It was our pleasure. It's not often we can do much for the cause, what with our responsibilities in the Avenger Initiative," Natasha said calmly, ignoring the man's flirting the same way she ignored Tony.

"What are you doing?" Steve hissed at them, "you can't talk about - that - with anyone!"

"Maestro Auditore knows about us," Clint said quietly. "I wouldn't be an Avenger if he didn't."

"Ezio Auditore da Firenze," the stranger said, inclining his head graciously, with a razor-sharp smile.

"And how do you know about us, exactly?" Bruce asked, with a similarly sharp smile that was more threatening than polite.

"I've been around for a while," the big man said easily. "I've seen government agencies come and go. The only reason I permit your continued existance is because no Templar has made it into your ranks."

"Templar?" Tony asked incredulously. "They were disbanded in 13-oh-something, there's no Templars now!"

"Forgive me, I thought our mutual friends had explained about the old war. I am glad you utilise only your own company's products and people, Mr Stark. Try to avoid any of Abstergo's stuff, hm? Make life easy on yourselves. Their stock is not as infallible as they think it is," Ezio said with a wolfish grin.

Tony could only blink. He'd been discussing buying out some of Abstergo's smaller subdivisions or becoming a shareholder in that company to expand his own empire only yesterday. He felt a chill run down his spine. He was used to Fury (and Coulson) knowing as much about his company as he did, but this stranger? It was eerie what he seemed to know.

The brunette girl called to Ezio from a distance.

"I must go, _amici_ , Messer Warren Vidic of Abstergo has an appointment with Death. I would hate for him to be late for it."

The Assassin left as silently as a summer breeze.

"In answer to your earlier question, Steve," Tony said, "let's not tell Fury about this. Or Coulson. Or anyone. And let's never, ever speak of it again."

*-*-*

Con-crit is appreciated!


End file.
